A TIME TO BREAK RULES TO FOLLOW GOD

There are always rules when we do PASA LOVE.  We do orientation before we leave and give short reminders during the event.  Everyone has to abide with these rules.  This is to avoid chaos at all cost.  Some of the rules we have are: Do not promise them anything.  If you do, you would need to fulfill that and not the church.  Another is do not give money.  If other patients sees that, they would want the same thing and create problems for us.  We can only give what we have brought.  Nothing more, nothing less.  This year’s PASA LOVE is at the Pedia Ward of Region 1 Medical Center at Dagupan City last December 3, 2011.

I thought I am strict enough to abide with all the rules I have made.  It would be different this time.  There are different rooms in the Pedia Ward of Region 1 Medical Center of  Dagupan City.  Each ward  brings different emotions for us as we meet different patients.  The Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) room is where newborn and less than a year old are in critical condition (that should be obvious).  Most of the kids there have an apparatus attached to them.  Aside from the dextrose inserted in them are other apparatus that monitors them.  It’s hard to see babies with so many attachment in them.

One child, barely a year old had the most apparatus attached to her.  She was suffering from meningitis.  The nurse was doing something with the apparatus when we went in while the mother was wiping her child.  I motioned my team to wait until the nurse leaves before we give the gift pack.

Watching them breaks my heart.  The nurse was trying to fix something from the apparatus.  But she was doing it half halfheartedly.  She  seemed to know that it was hopeless for this little child.  After all, 1 out of 20 survives from meningitis.  She was just going through the motion but she was not giving any signs of hope.  She seemed to know what was inevitable and she was trying to do motions to convey that at least, she was doing something.  But there was no more hope in her face.

It was obvious the baby was stiff.  The mother was wiping her child but she was not moving and her body was like frozen.  It was stiff.  She seem to be wiping a baby doll.  There was no movement in the flesh.  It’s like she was wiping wood.  The scene was heart wrenching.  Only a mother can keep doing this.

The wiping stopped when the nurse spoke.  The nurse told her that she needs to transfer her child to another hospital.  They have done the best that could do and they simply don’t have the equipment or medicine to cure this.  My heart broke when I heard the nurse said that.  I knew what that means.  She was not saying it, but it’s the same as saying, “Your child will die soon.  Move her out.”  I have seen what meningitis can do to a child.  I have prayed for one and it still died.  It’s a powerful disease.   It attacks the brain rapidly.  It’s hard to hope for healing and miracle but my hope is in God who knows what He’s doing.

When the nurse left, my team went to the mother and gave her the gift pack. Something I believe the child will never see or even taste.  I was taking pictures at that time.  She was crying when our team prayed for her.  While looking at the whole thing I was being pulled back and forth because something or Someone was telling me to give more than the gift pack.  I felt that I ought to give more – like money.

I was frozen at the end of the bed.  I tried to brush it away because probably I was being carried away by my emotions.   But it simply won’t go away.  I had to reason out that we have rules.  We can’t do this!  What about the other patients?  She’ll need a large amount.  My money won’t make a difference.  Suddenly all the verses about helping the poor flooded my mind.

Why was I resisting something that I know is a prompting from God.  Maybe I also needed the money even more?  Maybe I was more concerned about rules than sick and dying children?  Maybe I know that I only have less and it wouldn’t make a  difference.  “I should have left my wallet,” I said to myself.

The prompting would not be ignored.  I was reminded that we can only give what we have.  God never asks us to give what we don’t have.  It’s what we give that gets multiplied.  This was an opportunity to do what is good and right.  My time was running out as my team was getting ready to leave.

I surrendered and said, “Okay Lord, I’ll obey.  I would not like to keep something for myself if others would have better use for it especially if it would mean that they would know You!  You have been good to me and my family and I’m not giving money….  I’m simply investing it in You.  Thank You for reminding what PASA LOVE should truly be.”

I waited for my team to get away first before I approached the mother.  I made short conversation.  I tried to give hope in spite of what I know is inevitable.  I bid her goodbye and took her  hand and gave money.  She took it while crying and said thank you without looking at me.  Leaving the room was like in slow motion.  I can see her wiping a stiff body while drops of tears was falling on her towel.  I left no longer thinking what could have I done or gain for myself with that money.  But I left joyful knowing I obeyed the promptings of God.  I know opportunities like this rarely happens, but when it does, I know I should obey.

I am reminded with this powerful verse: Proverbs 3:27-28, “Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act. Do not say to your neighbor, “Come back later; I’ll give it tomorrow”—when you now have it with you.“

Yes, I broke our rules but the promptings of God is far more important.

Yes, I could have gained something with what I gave, but it will be temporary.  I’ll never know the extent of what I gave but I know God can multiply what little thing I have.  An investment in obedience is an investment for eternity.

God was not interested how much I have, but how much do I love Him enough to obey and trust Him.

Truly, this PASA LOVE is more than an event, but a breaking experience.

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PASA LOVE is a ministry engaged in doing acts of kindness in our community focusing on the marginalized and poor sector of the society believing that acts of kindness are the best way to show how much God loves them (Matthew 5:16).  We also believe that we are to intentionally reach out to them because God commanded us to do and is the very example Jesus showed us (Isaiah 58, Luke 4:18-19).

For more information and on how you can be part of this, just write to us and we’ll be more than glad to let you know what PASA LOVE is.  Just write to: easy_rael@yahoo.com.

Thank you to Kuya Harv Vard for the Toy Story 3 toys and to all for those who prayed and supported us.  It really means a lot.  God bless all of you.